Oh the times, they are a-changing…

There’s a new Bob Dylan album out and to get ready for it, I’ve been listening to a lot of  older Bob Dylan music lately. Say what you want about Dylan’s voice, you can’t deny that the man speaks the truth.  And no truer words spoken than, “The times, they are a-changing…”

What I’m trying to say is that my rehabilitation from my second arm fracture hasn’t been going quite as planned.

I thought it would be just like when I was 12 years old:

The doctor would take the cast off, I’d wind my arm back and then SNAP! My arm would thrust forward, the doctor’s nose would break and he’d scream, “Funky butt lovin’–!”

But no, it hasn’t been like that at all. It’s just been hard. My arm aches, especially when “a hard rain’s gonna fall” (thank you again, Dylan). In fact, I’d say that my arm is worse today than it was last year.

I don’t know. Life seems to be slipping away from me. I feel like maybe I’m getting too old for this shit. One of my best friends, Clark, is married with a kid. And my other best friend, George, is getting married this summer. Don’t get me wrong. I’m happy for him. But he’s living with his fiance now and too busy to work on baseball with me like he did before.

I’m beginning to realize that this is a battle I’m gonna have to face alone.

In the meantime, the Cubs have been losing….bad. Today was their 7th straight loss in a row. I can’t help but feel guilty. I know it’s not my fault that they won’t try to end the Rowengartner Curse by putting me on the team. But I can’t help but feel somewhat responsible. I wish the Cubs organization would see that I just want to help.

But sometimes no matter how bad you want something that doesn’t mean you’re going to get it. As Dylan said, “When you can’t get what you want, you have to settle for something less.”

The problem is that I’ve been focused on this one thing that I want for so long that I don’t even know what I’d settle for. It’s like there’s a whole other world going on out there and I don’t speak the language. 

Maybe I’ll feel different tomorrow. Maybe I’m just “tangled up in blue” right now. Just wanted to let you all know where I’m at. 

Thanks for your continued support.

-Henry Rowengartner

p.s. I’ll be bartending this whole week, so come by the pub during the Cubs games to say hello.